Mental Health Conversations - Why Silence Still Does the Most Harm

Today is #TimeToTalk Day.

For all the progress we’ve made around mental health awareness, many people still hesitate when it comes to talking about their own mental health, or checking in on someone else’s. Not because they don’t care, but because they’re worried. Worried about being nosy. Worried about saying the wrong thing. Worried about opening a door they won’t know how to close.

That hesitation, however understandable, is one of the quiet ways stigma survives.

When we assume someone won’t want to talk, we reinforce the idea that mental health is something to be hidden, managed privately, or only discussed when it reaches crisis point. Silence sends a subtle message that struggling is something to be ashamed of, rather than a normal part of being human.

In reality, many people don’t need answers, diagnoses or solutions. They need space. They need to be heard. They need reassurance that they’re not alone.

Why Mental Health Conversations Feel So Difficult

Mental health conversations are often avoided because they feel risky. Unlike physical health, there’s no plaster, no scan, no clear “fix”. People worry they’ll say the wrong thing, make it worse, or cross a boundary. Some fear that asking how someone really is will mean taking on responsibility they’re not equipped for.

Avoiding the conversation doesn’t make the problem disappear. It simply leaves people feeling isolated inside their own thoughts. Most people who are struggling aren’t expecting professional-level support from a friend, colleague or manager. They’re looking for empathy, not expertise. Comfort, not cures. Reassurance, not resolutions. Sometimes what helps most is hearing: “I’m glad you told me.”“That sounds really hard.”“You don’t have to deal with this on your own.”

The Power of Reaching Out

Reaching out to someone about their wellbeing can feel daunting, but it can be profoundly powerful. A simple, genuine check-in can interrupt a spiral of loneliness or distress. In some cases, it might even save a life. In many others, it can be the difference between someone feeling invisible and someone feeling supported.

Not everyone who is struggling will need professional help. Some people just need time and permission to express how they’re feeling without judgement or pressure to “fix” it. Being listened to, without being rushed or analysed, can be deeply regulating in itself.

Even if someone chooses not to open up, the act of asking still matters. It signals care. It leaves the door open. It reminds them that support is available if and when they’re ready.

Tips for holding a conversation about mental health

There are various frameworks for holding a mental health conversation, which we go into in depth during our bespoke mental health courses and MHFAider training. However, a wellbeing conversation needn't be complex or something to worry about.

Overall, it is far more important to be genuine and empathetic in your approach rather than worrying about what the right or wrong thing to do is.

We hope that some of our tips below are helpful in guiding you through a wellbeing conversation:

• Don't ignore the warning signs.

• If you have a gut feeling someone might be struggling, make a plan to reach out to them.

• Think about when and where would be best to approach the person i.e least busy time, in a safe space.

• Open up the conversation on some common ground, maybe asking what they watch on TV last night.

• At some point, ask how they’ve been feeling lately and be prepared to ask twice. (Fine has many meanings!)

• Try to stay calm and relax – it’s infectious!

• Try to ask open ‘How, What, When, Why’ questions to understand how the person is feeling, what helps them and how we might be able to help them.

• Allow time and space for people to reflect and give their answers.

• Try not to interrupt but listen deeply.

• Provide lots of comfort, reassurance and validation. Not fixes, solutions or 'advice' - leave that to the professionals!

• Signpost towards further help, either in-house or externally, if the person is agreeable to that.

• Don't take it personally if the person doesn't want to speak to you and let them know your door is always open.

• Remember to check-in to keep the supportive conversations going.

  
  

We don’t have to have all the answers.  Simply being there can make a real difference.

If you would like a discovery call to see how The Mind Hub can support your organisation, please get in touch.